4.24.2005

Kal Ho Naa Ho, Part 11

Disco music plays as we cut to a club with lots of pink lighting. The club appears to have a strict dress code requiring either skintight vinyl or swimwear. Bonus points for both! Aman, Sweetu, and Rohit do a shot, and Frankie asks them if they’re having fun. He invites Sweetu to hang out in the DJ cabin while Aman asks Rohit and Naina how they met. They say that they met at the park, where they were walking their doggies. When Aman points out that Naina doesn’t have a doggy, Rohit explains that Naina was walking his doggy, because he has two doggies and in fact sometimes looks like a doggy. It’s funny because it’s true. Naina finishes the convincing story by saying that then they met at a friend’s house. When Aman asks which friend, Rohit sees Gita and says, “Gita!” Rohit reminds Naina that it’s that Gita with the two filthy children, then says hi to Gita. Gita asks Rohit why he isn’t out with his family, and Rohit introduces Aman and Naina as his mummy and daddy while Aman stares at Gita’s boobs.

Aman asks Gita if she is the same Gita with the two filthy children, and Rohit spits out his drink. Gita yells at him for not telling her that he had a girlfriend. Rohit says that Naina isn’t his girlfriend, but Gita walks off angrily. Aman says he’s confused, and Naina tells him to shut up, because he knew all along that she and Rohit weren’t boyfriend and girlfriend. She says that Aman was the one who told her to laugh, smile and say “Eee Hee Hee!” but Aman points out that he actually told her “Nnnnnnggggg! Nnnnnggggg!” Rohit tries it too, because it’s fun. Nnnnngggg!

Naina says that if living life means dancing, singing, and drinking, anyone can do it, but she doesn’t want to. Aman says that she can’t do it because she’s a bloody bore, and Rohit tells her that she is quite boring. The subtitles transcribe this as “You are a cute boy.” It must be one of those lift/elevator, batchmate/classmate type of things. Rohit and Aman turn away from Naina and talk about how hot Gita is. Naina looks pissed, pushes past them toward the bar, and does five shots in a row. Aman cheers her on as Rohit looks concerned. Naina starts screaming and runs out onto the dance floor. She grinds with a bald guy in a hot pink wifebeater then screams in his face. In Hindi, she tells a go-go dancer writhing on a pillar to get down. The dancer is confused, so Naina drags her down, stands on the pillar, then screams at Frankie to stop the music.

As a new beat kicks in, Naina takes off her glasses, squints for a moment, then pouts sexily. She unzips her jacket. Aman looks on eagerly, while Rohit covers his eyes. Naina rips off her jacket to reveal a sports bra-looking top. Rohit wants to stop her, but Aman points out that everyone else at the club is naked, too, and cheers her on. Naina jumps around, pointing at her back, then sings that hers is a crazy heart. She shakes some imaginary maracas and sways to the beat, because she has nothing to feel shy or hesitate about. As she dances and sings, she sings that they should dance. And sing. Because it’s the time to disco! Something something kisko!

Naina says that you never know who you’ll meet when it’s the time to disco. Hey, it’s Rohit! He points in different directions and sings that his is also a crazy heart. He drops to his knees and springs up again repeatedly, then flaps his arms like a bird as women chat in the foreground about the crazy flapping guy on the dance floor. He twirls his jacket over his head and throws it in the air, because it’s still the time to disco. Rohit and Naina do a little jig, then disco-point toward the ceiling. Everyone jumps up and down and points toward their backs, including Aman, who is still sitting at the bar. Rohit tells some hot chicks to go over and grind with Aman. The hot chicks fondle Aman in slow motion front of a wind machine while Naina looks on jealously.

Now Aman’s dancing! He does some chorus line kicks and sings about gyrating bodies. He reaches up to the ceiling because his heart’s being carried away in the storm, then thrusts out his crotch. I hope that doesn’t get carried away in the storm as well. Rohit is drowned in merriment, and does the Pulp Fiction finger triangle move. Naina skips around and shakes her imaginary maracas again, then joins Aman and Rohit in pointing to the ceiling and informing us that it’s the time to disco in case we hadn’t heard yet.

As the music slows down, Rohit, Naina, and Aman go to the back room of the club where all the drunken grinding occurs. Naina grinds drunkenly with the guy in the hot pink wifebeater, then starts grinding with Aman. She realizes she’s grinding with Aman, looks horrified, then goes to grind with Rohit. Two guys sing, “Woah Woah!”

Aman points to his ass and then marches in place; behind him, Rohit does a split next to a smoke machine. They sing about being young and drunk. Naina sings that this is the way to be. I totally wish I was drunk right now. Naina shimmies behind a woman who looks like she’s wearing men’s underwear. Rohit, Naina, and Aman do another jig and announce that it’s the time to disco. Rohit and Aman decide that they should inform Naina that it’s the time to disco. Naina dances on top of the bar and tells us again about her crazy heart. That’s the problem with getting drunk; you start repeating the same stuff over and over again. Plus sometimes there’s ill-advised anonymous sex. A vinyl-covered ass bumps another ass; I think it’s Aman’s. Aman sways to the beat with the hot chicks. Rohit looks at an ass that’s shaking about two inches from his face. Aman sways with the hot chicks some more, while Rohit swoons, because his brain has gone into ass overload. Guess what time is it, guys? I’m not going to tell you. Oh all right, it’s the time to disco! Naina does another shot. Then another. She shoves Aman and starts to tell him something, but falls over. Rohit concludes that she’s drunk, then falls over. Aman looks at them, then goes out to dance some more while the song winds down. Disco!

Part 10 Part 12

2 Comments:

At 5/10/2006 6:11 AM, Blogger roswitha said...

BWAHAHAHAHA. ASS OVERLOAD!

 
At 6/26/2008 4:07 PM, Blogger Goot said...

I love you!!! can't stop reading!:D

 

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