Kal Ho Naa Ho, Part 6

Suddenly, winter becomes summer. No one knows why. Children in brightly-colored clothing play hopscotch in the street as the bhangra group rehearses nearby. The people in this movie really seem to have very little concern for the possibility of being run over by oncoming traffic. Shiv sits on the stoop and heckles the basketball players until one of them calls him a little shit. Gia feeds her doll, which has an enormous head. Shah Rukh Khan sits down between them and says hello. He explains that he is their neighbor, then they insult each others’ relatives. They hear Lajjo and her friends’ horrible singing from upstairs, so Shah Rukh Khan starts yelling, interrupting the song. He calls Dadi Jennifer Lopez, perhaps because she has a fantastic ass, then he tells them to stop singing, because they are torturing Saraswati and causing the basketball players to lose their belief in music. Kammo or Vimmo (I have no idea which is which) asks who he is, and he introduces himself as Aman Mathur, Chadda-ji’s nephew.

Chadda-ji shows up to apologize for Aman, and Aman makes up a song about Chadda and Lajjo’s prem kahani, waow-waow-waow, waow-waow-waow, waow-waow-waow. It’s almost as good as the Kunwari Kudi theme song. Aman tells Chadda that Dadi is quite sexy, as Chadda nods. Lajjo yells at Chadda, so he hides behind Aman, because Lajjo will never find him there. Naina sticks her head out a nearby window to ask what’s up with all the noise so early in the morning. According to her shirt, Naina is a “Sporty Girl.” Aman gawks at Naina, whose expression indicates that she wants to know what the hell Aman is gawking at. Aman gestures for her to remove her glasses, but she pushes them up further and walks off in a huff. He continues gawking as Lajjo and her friends complain that he has come to their locality and stopped them from singing.

A singing voice is heard through the window. Apparently, the voice saw someone moments ago. Cut to Aman, who sings, “Who is that stranger?” as Naina hides behind her portable MBA desk reference. As a gigantic American flag rises up to fill the screen, Aman wonders what he may say to the stranger. Hit it! Chadda starts playing the dhol as Naina comes outside to figure out what the fuck is going on. Jazz and Sweetu dance and water their hedge. The friend that I’m just going to start calling Vimmo has a random streamer draped over her head and seems a bit disoriented. Aman continues to wonder about the stranger that he saw moments ago, and whether she is a bud or a ray. He sings, “Pretty Woman!” and everyone yells “Hey!” because the song suddenly seems familiar to them.

Aman does a dance that resembles the Macarena as he sings, “Pretty Woman! Look!” Then he plays some air guitar. Lajjo seems frightened, Vimmo continues to look confused, and Naina wears the skeptical expression of someone who can’t quite believe that a random dude in orange parachute pants has orchestrated an elaborate, quasi-patriotic dance routine on her front porch to a Hindi version of a Roy Orbison song.

Kammo and Vimmo start nodding their heads to the crazy bhangra beat while Aman shrugs his shoulders and throws imaginary stuff in the air. Naina scowls, and her mom nudges her playfully. In the backseat of a convertible, Aman and some women with well-defined abs dance and twirl those ribbons on sticks that rhythmic gymnasts use. Two little girls play under a sprinkler. One of them is shivering, so I guess the water is kind of cold.

Part 5 Part 7


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