Koi Mil Gaya, Part 8

Nisha, now dressed in formalwear, covers Rohit's head with her scarf and asks him how meeting her makes him feel. Rohit sings that he'll whisper the answer in her ear if she comes closer, but Nisha runs away from him. As she runs away from him, she explains that she is not heeding his request to come closer. When Nisha is finished with her Grover impression, Rohit sings about meeting an unnamed person again, then Nisha plays peek-a-boo with her bangles and does some bharatnatyam-esque dance moves. Rohit plays peek-a-boo too, but can't keep up with Nisha's mad bharatnatyam skillz.

Rohit, now dressed in a blazer, rows Nisha across a lake. He docks his boat, the S.S. Goodsirs, at the bank of the lake, reenacts a Coke commercial, then taunts Nisha with false promises of a cookie. Nisha, pissed at the cookie-taunting, leaves in a huff, so Rohit follows her, offers her the cookie, and sings that when Nisha is with him, she is close to him. Justifiably unimpressed by these sentiments, Nisha continues to walk away, but Rohit salvages the date by explaining that even when she's not with him, she's close to him. About to bite into the cookie, Nisha pauses, singing that "There can't be a realization like this one." She rewards Rohit for his unprecedented realization by giving him back the cookie, tapping him on the nose, and adjusting his tie. I'm totally not understanding the dynamic between these two at all. Is Nisha is girlfriend or his mom?

Rohit does one of his spazzy dances as he sings that he doesn't understand what's happening, either. Nisha demands that he must understand, he must (!), shoves him, grabs him by the tie, then dances all sexy-like next to him. I think this song is supposed to illustrate the confusion of late-onset puberty. Rohit and Nisha do the "I've found someone, but I'm not going to explain who he or she is" dance, then Rohit escorts Nisha through a gigantic field of grass as the song fades out.

Cut to Rohit, asleep at his computer. I should have known that that song was too vague to be anything but a fantasy sequence. Sonia calls Rohit in to dinner as the computer equipment shoots off giant sparks of foreshadowing.

Basketball court. Raj makes a shot, putting the Kasauli Tigers ahead of the Blue Bulls. (I know there's a joke to be made right here, but the possibilities are just too overwhelming.) Nisha, wearing a yellow Tigers cap and some hot pink whiskered jeans, cheers, then spots Rohit across the court and beckons for him to join her. Rohit steps over a Honda billboard and walks directly across the basketball court, where Raj crashes into him mid-play. Rohit apologizes, but Raj raises his fist to punch him and exclaims, "Djjjdshsht!"

Fortunately, Nisha steps in and escorts Rohit off the court as the announcer explains to the crowd that a beautiful girl is walking away with the boy, and that he's not sure which story to narrate. I think it would be awesome if I went to a basketball game and the announcer started giving color commentary on some random date that was going on in the stands. Unfortunately, the announcer seems to disagree, and instead narrates that the Blue Bulls have stolen the ballonce (?) from Raj and tied up the score. As the seconds tick down, Rohit offers Nisha some Lays potato chips, Nisha ignores him and cheers for the Tigers, the subtitles announce that Raj Saxena has scored the winning basket, then five seconds later Raj Saxena scores the winning basket. Raj hangs from the basket and showboats as Nisha hops around, clapping dorkily and screaming, "YAAAAAY!" As Raj accepts the (Honda) Hero Cup on behalf of his team, Rohit observes Nisha's teenybopper-like fawning, sighs, and looks away sadly. Hell, I'm not even in love with Nisha, and I can hardly bear to look at it.

Later that night, Rohit practices basketball in the darkened gym. The stadium lights ignite one-by-one. A moment later, Raj walks onto the court with his gang, attempting to look as menacing as is possible when sporting a popped collar, Elvis hair, and a shiny, skintight plastic shirt decorated with a print resembling turkey feathers. I wish people dressed like Raj at my gym. Raj asks Rohit what he's doing there; Rohit tells him he wants to become a basketball champion like Raj, so everyone will clap for him. Raj offers to teach Rohit basketball, but the offer is punctuated by a threatening, thunderclap-like noise that I believe is meant to indicate that the lesson will involve humiliating Rohit in some manner. (Sorry if I ruined the surprise.) Raj and his friends form a circle around Rohit and pass the ball around him, then peg him in the face with it. Raj apologizes, but Rohit tells him it's ok. They hurl the basketball at Rohit's head a few more times, knocking Rohit's glasses off and making him cry. They stop to point and laugh for a moment, then resume whipping the ball at Rohit's head, as Rohit inexplicably stands there and takes it. Finally, Raj hands Rohit his glasses, warns him not to try to compete with him for Nisha, then heads off to his Thanksgiving Elvis disco party.

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