9.27.2005

Koi Mil Gaya, Part 6

Rohit does some fancy wire-assisted dance moves and sings that he's breaking free. So then how does he plan on performing his fancy wire-assisted dance moves? He slips and falls on his ass. See, I knew he should have stuck with the wires. Nisha offers him her hand, then they dance around in the rain in front of a Sansui sign. Now Nisha's breaking free! And pointing! Rohit and Nisha do a marionette-like dance, then some badly-dubbed tapdancing, then jump in a puddle of mud. As they sing about how much fun they're having, they dance around a pole, but not like strippers. Next they dance around a tree, meet in front of the tree, do their supercool handshake, then erupt into hysterical laughter. I had no idea dancing in circles around tall objects could be so hilarious. Rohit fiddles around with his suspenders, then skips down the street with Nisha. While Rohit does some more fancy wire-dancing, Nisha does some similar but less fancy non-wire dancing behind him. I wonder if she wishes she'd downed a few Bacardi and Cokes at the club so she could defy the laws of physics via invisible wires like drunk-ass Rohit. Rohit does a backflip and falls on his ass again.


They head over to the Nescafe, where Rohit does a short but entertainingly spastic dance routine and then leaps on a chair, toppling it over. After Rohit sits down and does some chair-dancing, Nisha and Rohit impersonate tornadoes, then do a pee-pee dance. Nisha asks Rohit what makes him so innocent; Rohit hands her a flower and explains that it's because Nisha is so sweet. As they continue to rob the florist, Nisha asks Rohit what makes her so sweet. Rohit responds, "Why should I tell you?" Nisha has no further questions. As Rohit pushes Nisha down the street in the flower cart, Nisha tosses flowers into the air. The florist is going to be pissed tomorrow morning. Hopefully Rohit can smooth things over later with a wad of gum, a "SORRY ROHIT" note, several zany misunderstandings, and a heart-wrenching speech from his mother. The flower cart topples over, giving Nisha an opportunity to emerge adorably from the wreckage, flowers poking askew out of her hair. Aw, I guess all the floral robbery and destruction was worth it for that moment of super-cuteness.


As she sings again about breaking free, Nisha slides down the playground slide. For some reason the verse is punctuated with a whip-cracking sound effect. Is there some sort of bondage subtext that I'm missing here? Rohit does the marionette dance again, then falls on his face for a change. He asks Nisha what she's done to him, she laughs, then they lie down on some sort of retaining wall as the song fades out.


Johnny Lever stands outside his house and throws rocks through his windows. Sonia approaches and politely asks what the hell is wrong with him. Johnny Lever explains that he got used to the breeze and sunlight from the broken windows and felt suffocated after he fixed them, because Rohit was too busy getting drunk and tapdancing to re-break them. Sonia suggests that he open the windows instead of breaking them. Johnny Lever appears stunned at the simple brilliance of the idea, then rants nonsensically some more. Sonia shakes her head and gives him the "You are a total assclown" look. I'm glad Sonia is here to express facially what all of us are thinking.


Rohit hangs out by a lake with his friends, who ask him if Nisha is his girlfriend. The boys ask if she really gave him a cycle, took him to a club, and dropped him at home. One of the girls gets to the point and asks Rohit if she kissed him goodnight. Rohit says no, and the girl explains that they can only become boyfriend and girlfriend when they exchange kisses. I wonder if she learned that from Pretty Woman. The boys ask what Rohit should do; the girl says that according to her mother, men are idiots who never seem to understand that they should further their friendship before trying to get into the girlfriend-boyfriend thing. It sounds like her mother has had some bad experiences on the Kasauli dating scene. Maybe she went out with this guy. Bittu suggests that Rohit give Nisha a present, but Rohit points out that he only gets one rupee a day from his mom. The girl suggests that Rohit get Nisha a rose. Are roses really cheap, or does everyone in this town just steal from the florist whenever they feel like it?


Nisha's house. Nisha skips downstairs in a dress that looks like it was made out of some drapes by Julie Andrews. Her father reminds her about "the boy whose mind is like a child's" and shows her an article about people like him that he found online and printed out for her. According to the article, people like Rohit should be given love and sympathy. I wonder if Nisha's dad found the article in The New England Journal of Things That Ought to Be Completely Obvious to Any Rational Human Being. Nisha flips through the article as she glances outside, where she notices Rohit pacing behind the fence, holding a rose up in the air. She invites him over, and he gives her the rose. Nisha thanks him and kisses him on the cheek, embarrassing Rohit. He explains shyly that his friends told him that exchanging kisses means they are boyfriend and girlfriend. Nisha brightly tells him that yes, she's his girlfriend. Well, that was easy.


Nisha's father calls her inside, so she invites Rohit in to meet her parents. Rohit takes a seat, and Nisha asks him what he wants to drink. Rohit asks for Bournevita, then delivers a short speech about why everyone should drink Bournevita that serves no purpose except to indicate to Nisha's parents that Rohit is an innocent man-child of the type described in the NEJTTOBCOARHB article. Nisha's father gets a call from the District Magistrate and tells Nisha to save his page on the computer while he takes the call. Nisha sits down at the computer and punches in some commands that seem more involved than Ctrl-S, then offers to teach Rohit about computers. Excited, Rohit invites her over to his house to see the computer his father built. Nisha agrees, but unless she wants to play "Lemonade" or talk to aliens, I have a feeling she's going to be pretty disappointed with Rohit's computer setup.


Part 5 Part 7

9 Comments:

At 9/27/2005 7:54 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Wow, my dating life is a lot more complicated than Rohit and Nisha's. I am so moving to Kausali.

Do you think the craigslist guy is for real? I have a friend who refers to herself as a Future Trophy Wife and I passed the link on to her.

 
At 9/27/2005 10:51 PM, Anonymous ads said...

Ooh, do you think you could get your friend the Future Trophy Wife to email him? Would that be mean? I think he deserves it, for having such ridiculous expectations.

If you move to Kasauli, at least you'll be guaranteed a spectacular view.

 
At 9/30/2005 7:38 PM, Blogger Beth said...

I emailed the Future Trophy Wife the ad. She was repulsed. I knew I could call her bluff someday! She rightly pointed out that the man is clearly deranged for a variety of reasons, the first of which being that there is no way you can keep a trophy wife on a five-figure salary. I mean, even I make five figures.

 
At 10/03/2005 10:01 AM, Anonymous ads said...

Well, I'm sorry that it didn't work out for Future Trophy Wife and Unrealistic Expectations Guy, but I guess it's for the best.

 
At 10/03/2005 2:21 PM, Blogger Beth said...

He needed to learn his lesson. Although, honestly, he seems unreformable.

 
At 6/24/2008 2:13 PM, Blogger ajnabi said...

Maybe you could get Rekha to give him the "you are a total assclown" look. Or at least get a screencap of it for future reference. I think he could also benefit from a subscription to the New England Journal of Things That Should Be Obvious to Any Rational Human Being, but he didn't say anything about it in the ad.

 
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